M: Looks like you've become more cautious about penning down thoughts via online media.
G: Because I met an interesting ...... as well.
M: You met interesting dots??
G: Interesting heart. M: I thought you would say interesting mind or brain haha. G: Heart has more warm connection than brain. M: That is if you can touch the heart.
Emotional, what is being more emotional? I didn't feel it before. Somehow now I can feel it. So good that I am not a machine anymore. Emotion drives us everyday. It is different from purpose. Purpose is something we do it intentionally. Emotion is the opposite way. It is something we can not control.
This year is amazing. I felt I grew up 3 years older in one year. And it is not because I went to tour some other places. Something just magically happened and wake me up this year. Yes, this world is truly different. It is different, because I never view it like this, I never open my eyes to see this colorful world. I was really wondering how I lived like that before. Live like a machine, think like a machine, and act like a machine. I was so cold and unfeeling to this world, to others, and even to myself. The beauty of the world is just beside myself. I did not chose to sense it. Suddenly I found I can learn so much at anytime, at everywhere. Last time, I had my goal. This time, I have my dream. I was Neo in the matrix. Now I am Neo in real world. It is so good to breathe the fresh air.
You may not believe it But I don't believe in miracles anymore And when I think about it I don't believe I ever did for sure All the things I've said in songs All the purple prose you bought from me Reality's just black and white The sentimental things I'd write Never meant that much to me
I used to be the main express All steam and whistles heading west Picking up my pain from door to door Riding on the storyline Furnace burning overtime But this train don't stop, This train don't stop, This train don't stop there anymore
You don't need to hear it But I'm dried up and sick to death of love If you need to know it I never really understood that stuff All the stars and bleeding hearts All the tears that welled up in my eyes Never meant a thing to me Read 'em as they say and weep I've never felt enough to cry
When I said that I don't care It really means my engine's breaking down The chisel chips my heart again The granite cracks beneath my skin I crumble into pieces on the ground
Not only something, it is the same for everything. The non-changing nature of everything is everything is changing. My mind was split into two part. I acted like two different people. One is a soft and fragile person. The other is a proud and aggressive person. How did this begin? In the beginning I was a proud and aggressive person. After I went through some failures, I become a soft and fragile person. I remember I still can turn back. I always try to suppress my aggressive part. But somehow it turns out my approach of solving problems are still straight forward and aggressive. I thought I can go through somethings to make me rely on someone else. In the end, the part I have been always suppressing has come out. And I change a lot. I thought that door could be closed, but it is opened again in a different way. Yes, I am still proud and aggressive. Moreover, I found I had already gained another character through these years. It is persistent. Nothing can change over night. I can not change myself overnight. What I can achieve is to change myself over years, change myself through experiences, and change myself by thinking more. The goals are important. And the each steps of reaching the goals are more important. I remember Dr Pickard said "Work hard, make use of our hands and do kick ass jobs".
I remember that Dr Roy told me"Guo Cheng, nothing can change over night. Things can change in long term. You should focus what you can do after next 6 months or next year."
2000 Miss Qiu, she helped me through my senior high school
2003 Miss Heather Bowden, her smiles encouraged me
2004 Ho's family, they are my family in Singapore.
2010 Prof C H Ling, he point out the direction of my career
And in 2010 it is a heart who changed my life forever. I received a lot from this heart. However, I didn't give too much. The shortest distance is the distance between two hearts. The longest distance is the distance between two brains. The strangest distance is the distance between a heart and a brain. The heart and the brain are so close, but they are at different height. The brain is trying his best to fly high to reach the heart. The brain didn't realised that only heart can fly.
Feel happy just now when I heard "Your mum's calligraphy is still hanged in my study room"
两天前给Heather打了电话，她刚从南京回来，现在她彻底退休了，她的儿子也快结婚了，她家要从墨尔本郊区搬到市里。喜欢听她的声音，她的声音里充满了鼓励。八年了，我八年没见到她了。说来真是奇怪，在上中学时见过不少外籍教师，像她这样又有教学能力又每天充满了笑容的只有她一个人。现在想起以前高中的生活太压抑了，作为学生的唯一目的就是把分数考高，没此都要听班主任和其他任课老师说形势多么多么的严峻，天天生活在这种压抑的环境下。唯独在她的课上，我能感受到鼓励，我记得她说过她给学生的Grade是"Good", "Great", 和"Excellent"，她从来没说过指责的话。后来我请她到我家吃过两次饭，第一次是炒菜，第二次是饺子，她第一次来的时候很喜欢我妈妈的书法，第二次她来的时候我妈妈就送给了她一幅裱好的书法，她高兴的像个孩子一样。后来我来了这边我每年都给她打电话，后来有一阵她去南京教书了，我们只有用E-mail来联络。有一次，我发给她我的照片，她回复说:"Richard, if you are not thinner, you must be taller now."我看了她的回复后在那边大笑。现在她已经退休了，真想有一天去墨尔本看看她，她在教我的时候头发已有些发白了，想必我再见到她时她应该已是银发满头了。8年了，时间过得好慢，时间过得好快。
A even more lazy way of writing blog is to post some Youtube video. I am really lazy recently. Understand the society a bit more. I thought Jerry's TV program is not true. Now I realized that it is quite close to reality. It is just that in Singapore, the TV shows are not that straight forward.
I don't understand why I am so focusing on the final result or outcome. Mr Low told me the best attitude is "赤子之心", which means act like a baby who feel curious about new things. Yes, I have got some of it. But I care about the final result as well. I am slowing changing myself to become more robust to failure. XL told me without of many failures, we wont' succeed. He is right.
I don't why I always want to keep a distance away from other people. Am I afraid of being hurt or losing face? I don't know the answer. And my dark side is getting stronger and stronger. I guess it is because I am influenced by this society. In the end, everybody has to become a part of this society. My sharp edges are being polished (I should say CMP). And I am getting smoother.
Promise never last forever. Everything has an beginning has an end. One way to avoid painful ending is to enjoy but never begin. Or the other best solution in this modern society is contract. Contact only last for certain period and contain certain terms. It can not last forever. But at least it provides some fairness.
Begin to understand the other side of "successful man". It is a dream that most men admire. But being "successful man" trade off the responsibility of father. Their wives have to take all the responsibility of raising kids. There is always trade off, isn't it?
I found the most effective way to learn is to meet people. This year is really a fun year, I learned tips from L and Y about electronics industry. I met D who shared me his previous working experience in factory. Then I met X and learned some business ideas. The most interesting person is M who really taught me a lot in financial market. I thought I had grown up. The reality is I am still growing up. It is exciting, isn't it?
In TV, there is a guy, Dr Lightman, who can read through people's thoughts easily. I thought this special ability only existed on TV show. However, in recent two years I have met three guys who can do that. The most recent one can see me through when we met for the second time. It is amazing how interesting this world is. It is said in Chinese: "山外有山，人外有人。"
It shocked me when I learned that the death of the founder of Singapore Judo Federation, Mr M. I didn't expect he would passed away. He was the founder of Singapore Judo Federation.
I remembered what P said to me and YT "We all will die, it is just how soon." I was expecting it will come so fast. Yes, we all have to die, it is just how soon.
Mr M was borned at the right time for playing Judo in Singapore. In 1940s, Judo was introduced in Singapore by Japanese. Old Judo players like Mr M, who started their sport career in 1950s, got good results in International competition. But after Judo became an Olympic sport, the sport became more and more competitive. And we all know that Singapore's part time players can no long stand against other countries' full time players. Mr M lived in a right time, otherwise he would become a unknown guy in this sport.
Few weeks ago, when I was chatting with R. She said in real life luck is important. She is right. We can control some, but not all.
I found myself love kids. Some kids are extremely adorable. One extremely adorable kid is my JieJie A's second daughter. She is so lovely that one of my friends name her as "the adorable girl".
Last Sunday night, when BaBa, JieJie C, JieJie C's 10 years old daughter and I went to visit JieJie A's home, we brought six Jin Sha crabs to JieJie A. When I just handed the crabs to JieJie A, the adorable girl saw me. She ran to me, hug my leg, and said sweetly:"Hello, Guo Cheng Ge Ge!"(Actually I like her to call me GeGe than uncle, because it shows that I am not that old.) She is just so lovely that everybody want to hug her.
Later, when we were enjoying crabs, I said to JieJie A in Mandarin that my friends called her "the adorable girl". JieJie A felt very happy and told me everybody said she is adorable. To my surprise, although the adorable girl didn't speak Mandarin often, she understood what I said in Mandarin. When she learned that she was named "the adorable girl", her face was with happy smile and pride. JieJie A made fun on her by saying"Guo Cheng GeGe was not talking about you, he was talking about mummy. Because mummy is adorable, you are also adorable".
Meanwhile in the dinner, JieJie A told us that her daughter met JieJie T's husband Simon one day. When she saw him, she immediately went closer, hug his leg, and said with her sweet voice"Hello, uncle Simon." The funny thing is at that time, Simon were using both hands carrying food. He didn't know what to do, but he was enjoying the moment.
Kids are really lovely. When I saw kids, especially those extremely lovely kids, it reminds me my childhood: taking care by parents, feeling happy, and no worrying all the time. If time can fly back, I want to be a kid again.
This was one of my painting during my first semester in NUS. At that period, I painted four black and white paintings. And I gave one of them to Dr Roy.
It is kind of simple but strange way to waste time. What I did was using pen and ruler, drawing meshes with different geometries, and painting them in black and white. It was not difficult to do my painting style. Plus all the lines in my paintings are straight lines draw with ruler.
This kind of paintings represented my feeling of sorrow and pain in that first semester of my NUS journey. I forgot how I get over that feeling. However, I still remember the smile of Dr Roy. Although she has left NUS, I still recognize her as one of the most helpful people in my life.
That was a dark and down period of me. I was over stressed by all the modules in the first semester of NUS. I told my friend A that I really can't take it. One day, she sent me an e-mail saying NUS offer free counseling service to students. She also provided me the -mail of counseling. I sent an e-mail to them. Later they called me back. They arranged a meeting with me.
For everyone who was first went for counseling, signing an agreement with counseling center was the first step. I signed an agreement that I need help from counseling. The counselor that they assigned to me was Dr Roy. She was a
Among all movies I watched, I favor action movies, because they are exciting and fast. One of my favorite action movies is District 13. It is a French movie. The actors in these movies were not famous. What I like most is the Parkour style and the French sense of humor in this movie.
This is a story told by my CS1102C (Data Structures and Algorithms) lecturer Dr Tan.
There is an old woman who has two sons. One son sells umbrella, the other sells ice-cream. She was always worrying, because on sunny days, no one buy umbrella while on rainy days, no one buy ice-cream.
One day, a friend of hers said "You should feel lucky. Because on sunny days, people buy ice-cream, and on rainy days people buy umbrella. Through a whole year, neither of your son have to worry about their business."
That is the story Dr Tan tell in the first lecture of every semester. He encouraged each of us to be positive. We can choose to be optimist or pessimist. Charles Dickens said "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times." Our attitude does matter.
Last week, I attend a solar cell conference in NUS. The conference lasted two days. On the first day, it was a two and half hours period with presentations from each research group in NUS. On the second, it was a one and half hours presentation given by two top researchers in this field who are from India.
On the first day, graduate students, research engineers, and professors from related research lab presented each of their result. Most of the presentations were about chemical cell(organic solar cell, dye-sensitized solar cell). My presentation was about improving efficiency on traditional single crystalline solar cell. Besides me there were only two more presenters talking about traditional solar cell. However, their research are about studying mechanism like cracking and minority carrier diffusion, which were quite different from my research direction. I noticed that my presentation did not raised much attention.
On the second day, two professors from New Deli presented their research work on the 4th generation solar cell. When I listened to their presentation, I was shocked that these two professors' ideas and results are state-of-the-art. To my surprise that the new solar cell structure they proposed was a 5 layers cell structure with conventional metal contact, single nano carbon wall, new organic material, and quantum dot. Their work is truly much advanced than my work. At that moment, I understand that why my previous presentation did not raised much attention.
My current situation is I am working on this project alone, because it is a small project and it is not the main research direction of my lab. It is kind of carrying out a work in isolation. After I attended the conference, I received a lot of new ideas 100 times faster than reading journals by myself. It is true that isolation is not a wise choice. I have also find that NUS and A*Star arrange conferences and seminar every months, which most of them are free for registration. Now I am ready to attend more of these to get new ideas and open my mind.
I am glad that I have 5 elder sisters and 1 elder brother here in Singapore. They gave me a lot of good suggestions. Two weeks ago we had a discussion about marriage.
Recently I heard that one of my friends is going to get married next year, which means he is going to get married at the age of 25. I have one more friend who is going to get married at his age of 25 in this August. Last year one friend got married at the age of 24. In this two years, there are a lot of weddings going on.
One of my childhood female friend got married in this February. Not only she and I are good friends, but also her mother and my mother are good friends. She asked me when I will get married. I told her that I don't know.
In a Sunday afternoon, I discussed this marriage issue with my brother and sisters. They said getting into marriage too early is not a good choice. My sisters opinion is that if a man get married in his 20s, and when the man get more power and more money in his 30s, having affair may not be rare. They said to me that if I get married earlier, there is a high possibility that I will have affair. They suggested that I can wait until I have stable job and income and man should not being rush.
I am glad that I can get advices from my sisters and brother. They are older than me. And all of them have experience on marriage. Off course, Daddy Peet also gave me a lot of good suggestions. Their opinions help me see the whole picture instead just feeling the pressure from my friends.
Kommer Igen Lyrics (Nik) jeg træder ud a min port, mandag morgen. sædvanligt trafik rundt om hovedbanegården. Folk på den ene og den anden side a loven. Følger nogen mon med fra oven.
(Jay) For her nede fortæller forsiderne mig. At hele verden går den forkerte vej. Jeg prøver på ikk at tro på alt hvad jeg lÊser. Prøver p at tro p det bedste i mennesker.
(Nik) Der sidder fire mænd p en trappe sten. Tomme blikke, Heroin. Byen vokser, Kaster skygger. Byen kan slå liv i stykker.
(Jay) Så hvordan kan jeg tænke på de penge jeg skal bruge. og om boligmarked mon vender nu. Trækker hætten over hovedet, gÂr over vejen. for mon ik det trækker op til regn.
(omkvæd) Hvor kommer det fra, hvor ender det henne. Dem du møder på vej op møder du p vej ned. kan jeg gøre det hele bedre når jeg kommer igen. er du sikker på vi satsede nok på kærlighed. Hvor kommer det fra, hvor ender det henne. Dem du møder på vej op møder du på vej ned. kan jeg gøre det hele bedre når jeg kommer igen. er du sikker på vi satsede nok på kærlighed.
(nik) Hvad med teenage piger der glipper deres ungdom gir deres krop for en Dom Perignon, siger deres job op for at blive berømt blandt andet fordi DU har solgt dem den drøm
(Jay) Hvad med hende jeg kender der så svær og modstå hvad er det der gør hun er sin kæreste utro hvad er det vi løber fra, hvad skal vi nå. og vil glem hvem vi er når vi når vores mål.
(Nik) jeg har tanker for ti, tænker ting itu. Jeg har trådt på andre, jeg har været jaloux. i 2001 stemte jeg p anders fogh. Men jeg ved bedre nu.
(Jay) og clubs fyldes med folk. der fyldes med drugs som selvfølgelig vil slås. og en knytnæve blev til en kniv. der blev til en pistol der blev til et næste liv
(Nik) Men der er en ting jeg ikk fatter. det her land burde være i vatter. Ring til mig når kærligheden er her. Jeg skrider for min datter kalder.
(omkvæd) Hvor kommer det fra, hvor ender det henne. Dem du møder på vej op møder du p vej ned. kan jeg gøre det hele bedre når jeg kommer igen. er du sikker på vi satsede nok på kærlighed. Hvor kommer det fra, hvor ender det henne. Dem du møder på vej op møder du p vej ned. kan jeg gøre det hele bedre når jeg kommer igen. er du sikker på vi satsede nok på kærlighed.
ÅH ÅH ÅH ÅH ÅH ÅH
og sig mig fik vi satset nok p kærlighed
ÅH ÅH ÅH ÅH ÅH ÅH
jeg ved at der er større ting i verden at tage sig a
C, Small Yin 3, and I went to M's birthday party last Saturday. It was crowd. There were twenty people there, including V, F, and YA.
F still tried to mention W to me. He thought I was still into W. In fact, he didn't understand what I really want. Years back I thought F was a talented guy in interpersonal skills, because he could spot other people's thinking easily. But now I understand that he is still as same as us that we all live in our own small world. He just applied his theories to other people. I remembered what Prof Ling told me. He said if intelligent creatures living in Mars want to model human, they may use a car model, which can describe heart as engine, blood as petrol, and etc, and the model do work sometimes, not all the time.
A invited me for a party called "The Secret Garden Party" last Friday.
To be on the guest list, I had to send an e-mail to the organising group. They have their page on facebook. It was said that beer would free of charge from 8:30pm to 10:00pm.
When I arrived there, I found out the party was not at a bar or a club. It was at a small garden beside a bar. I guess that's why they called it the secret garden party. It was teeming with more than one hundred people. There was a DJ in the center of the garden. Inside a house in this garden, there was a place selling all kinds of wine. In one spot of this garden, people lined up in several queues for free beer.
I arrived there quite late. It was almost 9:50pm. A and her friends had already reached there before 9:30pm. Before I met A, I saw S in the crowd. It was really unexpected. I chat with S for a while. She seemed quite pleased with her current job and was having fun in the party with her friends. Later on, I found A and her friends were standing near the DJ. She was thoughtful that she took almost 10 cups of beer for me and her friends. We had a long chat. A's job was about marketing even though her major was mechanical engineering. I think engineering involved many hands-on works which was not preferred by most women. Then I introduced A to S. They had a nice chat. Unfortunately, I left at 11:00pm, because I still got some samples to handle in the lab on the next morning.
I do like that they offered a lot of free beer and the party was crowded. However, the garden is small and there were not many seats. When I talked with S and A, we kept in standing posture. I think I prefer a party which can not only offer drinks but also places to rest, because party is about socializing and we can't always stand too long. Probably a pool party, which offer drinks, pool, and music, is what I want. I only heard about it, but never experience it. If there is one, I will be looking forward to it.
I just found a nice designed wallpaper about NBA 2010 playoffs. The painter didn't draw all the tattoos of these star players, because it would be too time consuming. However, it is still a well designed painting.
I remember when I was a small kid who was shorter than one meter, my parents brought me to train swimming. That swimming complex was located in the center of He Ping district, Tianjin. It was called "the second swimming pool of Tianjin". At that time, the training was tough. I was not a kid with perseverance. I had only trained for one and half years. I quit it when I began my primary school.
Back in the old days, most swimming pool's water was in green color, not blue color. Those old swimming pools were not advanced enough to integrate with water circulation system. As a result, new water was only refilled once per week. To keep the water clean, large amount of bleach was dumped into the pool. Even I stood in front of the gate of the swimming complex, I could still feel the smell of bleach. Usually after a training session, my hair turned yellow a bit. In fact it was a cheaper way for Chinese people to color hair to yellow than going to a hairdressing shop. A chemical compound in swimming pool even worse than bleach is urea. Urea in a pool did not come from fertilizer, because human body does not generate fertilizer but urine. It sound horrible, didn't it? Yes, it was true. Ten years ago, the worst swimming pool in Tianjin was in Tianjin Medical University. The urea level in that pool the urea was reported 25 times more than the minimum standard. Luckily it was closed down and filled by land a few years ago.
When I first saw the green color water, I was scared. I didn't want to jump inside, because I was afraid of choking underwater. I just stood at side and hesitated to take any moves. My coach, Ms Cao, was famous for being strict with kids. She kicked my ass then I fell into the pool. That was how I get into a pool for the first time. Then I stayed on for training for one and half year, but I only learned frog style swimming. Ms Cao's daughter, Q, who was a very cute little girl like my sister's daughter, trained much harder then me. She took swimming as a part of her life and eventually became very successful in back crawl style swimming. Compare to her, I was not that cute and I haven't achieve much in swimming.
After I quit swimming classes at the age of six, I have almost never been to swimming pool again until I began my study in Nanyang Polytechnic. There was a beautiful blue color swimming pool equipped with water circulation system located inside the campus. Sometimes, my friends V, G, and K (also called big Yin3, there also a small Yin3) asked me to join them for swimming. At that point I pretty much forgot all the techniques of frog style, all I did was some kind of "frog style" which looked like "bear style".
My friend A is an expert in swimming, who was also a important team member of NYP swimming team. She could switch flawlessly from one style to another and not reducing her speed. I was shocked. At that time, I thought mastering all the four styles was an extreme difficult task. And to swim fast would be a even more difficult task. Not even compare to her, just comparing with my friend V, G, and K, my speed was as slow as a turtle. But somehow I could still do the "frog style". I was not aware that my movements were quite ugly until my friend C pointed out my mistakes.
C is one of my good friends. And he is a talented swimmer. During secondary school, he represented He Xi district of Tianjin in swimming competition. His coach Mr Wu was the 200m free style swimming national champion of China. His "big brother" LS was the 200m butterfly style swimming national champion of China. One day, only C and I went to swimming in NYP's beautiful blue pool. When C saw how I swam, he rocked with laughter. He said I was indeed a bear struggling in water, because my techniques were all wrong and my speed was slow despite using a lot of strength.
On that day, he taught me the proper techniques of frog style (Breaststroke): Breaststroke seems easy, but most people did it wrong. The leg movements are quite simple, which look like a "frog kick". Most people can master it quickly. However, the arm movements are not easily to be trained. Most people did their arm movements wrong, because their both arms sweep in circular motion. Thus it is hard to get more power to push head out of water to breath. The right way is to sweep arms until they reach the vertical planes of two shoulder. Then sweep elbows back to chest to press water down. As a result, there will be a big power created to push the body out of water.
As C was professional in swimming, he corrected me all my techniques during that training. Now every week C and I go to swimming. In each session he tried to spot my minor mistakes and corrected them. Thanks to his guiding, I have improved a lot in both techniques and speed. For the frog style, I have transformed from a bear to a frog. I am still on the journey of mastering other styles. C also trains me free style every week. For butterfly style, I may have to look for the help from C's "big brother" LS. And I will probably left back crawl style for Q to teach, since she was my childhood friend.
My transformation from bear to frog was just finished while my new journey in swimming has just started. Although I am not going to be as cute and professional as Q; I am not going to be a champion like Mr Wu and LS; I am not going to be an expert like A or C; I am even not going to win any medals, I will continue my learning with C and enjoy my learning experience. I keep in my mind what the founder of the International Olympics Committee Pierre deCoubertin said "The important thing is not to win, but to take part".
In October 2008, I had a visiting training at a competitive Judo Club in Haarlem Netherlands. The club is well-known in Europe, because many excellent Judo players come from this club. One of them is Guillaume RicaldoElmont. He won the World Judo Championship in 2005. It was a great honor for me to trained with him for one session. After experiencing his Judo moves, I though I would never meet a better Judo player. Ironically, I was wrong. It is said there is always someone who is better.
In May 2009, the Singapore Judo Federation hired a coach from China. His family is Zhou and everybody calls him coach Zhou. When I first met him, I was surprised that he is only one year older than me. I showed some interests of his training. He told me that he can throw me more than ten times in a minute. I was laughing inside, because even in Netherlands' national team training, the worst case was I got thrown 6 times per minute. I felt like a pizza. I told coach Zhou that I don't believe he can achieve that and I will prove he is wrong. In the end, after I tried once with him, I regretted for what I said earlier.
In his training session, I fought 5 minutes randoriagainst him. Last time in Holland, I felt like a pizza being thrown around. During the fight, Coach Zhou threw me like flying a rotiprata. In one minute, he threw me around 12 times. He reminded an old Chinese quote "There is always another heaven beyond this heaven".
I was shocked that he played so well and yet he was not a world champion. He told me his was not lucky that he only got number 5 in world judo championship. However, he trained with KoseiInoue (the "Lebron James" in Judo) before. He threw Kosei hard and Kosei respect him and trained with him for a whole afternoon.
I was not the only one who experienced this rotiprata feeling from Coach Zhou. I met a Janpanese student from Osaka. His name is Koji. He looked polite, sincere, and humble. In fact, one of my schoolmates told me her sister was very into him. In Judo, he is a smart player with sharp techniques (not like me, I use a lot of power). He is a guy who seek for strong player. After knowing him, I informed Coach Zhou and invited him to Zhou's training. Usually in the fighting session, each of the student play only one round with the coach. When Koji fought Coach Zhou in the first round, Zhou didn't use all his strength. But still Koji was thrown like a doll. To our surprise, Koji didn't walk away and fought two more rounds with Zhou. As Zhou got warmed up, his movements and techniques turned sharper. And I became a witness of how the coach "cook" Indian prata. After the training, Koji told me he respectZhou a lot.
Without any doublets, there is always someone better. And the gap between professional players and armatures is undeniable huge. But I don't feel sad. Through experiecing top players in the world, I learned solid skills are the basic to be a topdog.
M is going to celebrate his XX years old birthday this month. He has booked a place in downtown east. There will be more than 15 people attending his party, including my friend F, C, V, LV, and YA.
It sounds a bit exciting. But for me it means I will meet F again and I am certain that he will "educate" me on his advice about W, which I have listened for many times. Being micro managed is not a pleasant feeling.
Before M decided to organize a party, he provide us two opinions for polling. One is having a party in downtown east. The other is having a dinner at Clark Quay. I was in favor of dinner at Clark Quay, because there are a lot of nice restaurants. Against my wish, most people chose downtown east.
M will order buffet from F's uncle company. After dinner, we can play poker, mahjong, or Play station 3. It will be an interesting night.
Marion Jones, a former world champion track and field athlete, has won five medals in the 2000 summer Olympics in Sydney Australia. In October 2007, Jones admitted taking steroids before the Sydney 2000 Summer Olympics. All her medals and prizes dating back to September 2000 were forfeited.
Tong Wen, a former champion Judo athlete, has won three times gold medal in the world Judo Championship and one gold medal in 2008 summer Olympics in Beijing. She failed the drug test after the world Judo Championship 2009 in Holland and was banned for competition for two years. Her coach excuse is "She trained in Europe and was sick of the food so we gave her a lot of pork chops when she came home."
Performance-enhancing drugs are substances used by athletes to improve their performances in the sports. Not only these two, but also a lot of famous athletes used performance-enhancing drugs to get advantage in their games. Since there are only a few athletes who were reported using performance-enhancing drugs, most people believe that it is rare for athletes to use drugs. When I was discussing with one of my junior yesterday about Tong Wen's drug test failure, he was convinced by the news from Sina that it was because of pork chops. However, I didn't believe the story. I think she defiantly used drugs. It is because pork chop is a common dish in Holland, Germany, and Denmark and there is no drug test failure news from these countries' athletes recently. Plus she is the only one from China Judo team who failed the test, and it is not reasonable for a national team to serve food to their player separately. Although I was certain about her usage of drugs, at that point, I still didn't believe using drugs is a common act in competitive sports.
Last Sunday, my friend C and I went for a dinner at his coach Mr Wu's home. We had a dinner with Mr Wu, Mrs Wu, and LS who was a student of Mr Wu's friend. Mr Wu was a famous swimming athlete in Tianjin, he was the China national champion in 200 meters freestyle swimming. LS was a famous swimming athlete in Tianjin as well. She was the China national champion in 200 meters butterfly style swimming. Most Singaporeans may know Ms Tao Li very well, who is an immigrant from China and won many awards in swimming for Singapore. But comparing her with LS, the former China national champion, Tao Li is no match. LS could beat her easily. It was an honor for me to meet these champions face to face. At that night, we talked about several different topics, including Singapore politics, working culture, and the use of Performance-enhancing drugs.
Based on his 40 years experience in swimming, Mr Wu told us that performance-enhancing drugs are wildly used by athletes. There are varieties of drugs. He explained to us the two basic working principles of drugs. One principle is increasing the oxygen delivered in blood. Once there are more oxygen circulates in blood, human body can burn energy in a faster rate. It can be achieved by increasing the heme level in blood. A simple method is to draw large amount of one's own blood out before the competition, store it in a fridge, and inject it back to the body on the day before the competition. By using this method, the heme level in blood can be even doubled. The other principle is increasing androgenic hormone. There are numerous drugs for tuning androgenic hormone. They are mainly used by female athletes like Marion Jones.
LS also shared us her experience on using performance-enhancing drugs. She said almost everybody in competitive sports uses drugs. It is an open secret. There are people who failed drug test, because the drugs they used are not state-of-the-art. In the record of the World Anti-Doping Agency, just simply the names of the banned drugs can be written as a thick book. Besides these drugs, there are still new drugs, which have smaller side effect and are hardly to be traced, being developed every year. She said in swimming, the leading country in these drugs research is the United States, and other countries including China buy drugs from US. However, the US society is less tolerate with dishonesty. As a result, Marion Jones had to apologize for her past mistake. The problem with China society is sometimes "pride" of the nation is more important than dishonesty. It is sad that a lot of my friends rather believe that Tong Wen's drug test failure is due to pork chops.
After the dinner, when C drove me back home, I was lost in thinking. What is the real purpose of sports? The founder of the International Olympics Committee Pierre de Coubertin stated that "The important thing is not to win, but to take part". Where did the spirit he emphasized go? Is it because this spirit left us or we, the "modern" people, abandoned it?
I found myself fell in love with DIY music made by normal people. This song is from a guy named Chris. As a rapper, his "name" is Krispy. A tasty name, isnt' it?
Last Tuesday I had my honor to welcome Janus visiting Singapore. Janus and I met for the first time in year 2007. One normal Monday, when I was in NUS training, Janus, Rune, and Anna came to join NUS judo club. Anna stayed in NUS for only one semester while Janus and Rune stayed for a whole academic years.
When I first heard that they are from Denmark, I was a bit surprise. There are not many danish people in Singapore. The image of Denmark in my mind was fuzzy. We got along very well, especially both Rune and me are fans of the fantasy tasty durian. Then before they left Singapore, I received the exchange offer from Technical University of Denmark where Janus and Rune are from. As a result, I went to Denmark and stayed one more semester with them.
Rune is a nice guy. He invited me, Mingru, and Songjie to his house for dinner. His father treated us traditional danish food with danish Christmas beer. Our favorite was the desert. It was a big cake with apple jam and cream.
Beside have delicious food in Denmark, I also had some in Holland. At that time, Janus was serving his industrial attachment in Shell Amsterdam. He was provide a flat with two bedrooms. I went there and stayed in his place for five days. One night, after touring around the famous red light district in Amsterdam, we had dinner in an Australian restaurant. They served as pork ribs and hamburgers. The pork ribs I ordered was really tasty. Beside that we had some black beers. So we ate, drunk, and watched football game in this small restaurant with rock music. It was a great night. (The red light district is a great spot to tour around and wave hand saying hello to people.)
I felt sad when I just came back from Copenhagen to Singapore. I missed my friends there. When I meet Ms Song Jie and Ms Mingru, I often mentioned the big cake, big ribs, Christmas beer, and black beer. They said I am a guy who is good at eating and drinking. Even if I go to restaurant now, I won't have the same feeling. Maybe it was because touring around red light district before the dinner gave me a good appetite.
To my surprise, Janus' company sent him to work in Singapore for two weeks. After haven't seen each other for more than one year, we met again. This time Songjie, Mingru, and I had a lunch in this Japanese restaurant "Sakura" with him. We all felt so glad except that Sakura doesn't serve beer.
Life is like this, people come and go. Saying goodbye is painful But its opposite side meeting again is joyful. This time I remember another ancient Chinese poem:
Recently I made an important decision. I left Singapore Judo Club, a place where I have practiced Judo for five years. I joined SA judo club which is Judo Club nearer to where I live. Transportation is the reason of my decision. By now I have been a formal member of three clubs, had visiting training in all the Judo Clubs in Singapore, and participated in more than twenty torments. When I traced back all the steps I made in Judo, I found the core value in martial arts sports, which is usually refer as "the fighting spirit", has its pros and cons.
There are many versions of naming it, fighting spirit, fight for the soul, for the flame and glory etc... Its pros are quite obvious. It made people more motivated and disciplined. However, through years of believing it, I spot its cons as well.
Sometimes this so called "fighting spirit" lead to extreme selfish and arrogant. Once for a while, when I threw my opponent on mats, I felt enjoyable and successful. It gave me a feeling of having power and dominance. When I stepped on the competition field, I felt like I was in the battle field and I would kill my opponent. An even more enjoyable feeling happened then I beat my opponent in a match. This "fighting spirit" bring me power and hatefulness together.
I remember Dr Roy said "Life is about balance." Now I truly appreciate her word. Realizing a lot of the players in Judo focus are arrogant, I think "fighting spirit" has its positive side, but it is not one cure for all problems.
Hello. When you read this title, you must be wondering what A represents. In this article, A represents a secret mysterious person.
A, I know your bunny is lovely. I made a joke that its meat will be tasty. Don't worry, I won't eat it. I like to watch its lovely long ears. I know you like to secretly read other people's blog without writing any comments. But please, if you read my blog, you will be welcome to give any comments on my articles. Thanks for your corporation.
And by the way, you are the most beautiful person I have ever met in this world. Hahaha..........
It is painful to watch a good friend leaving. Yesterday I just experienced that.
Y, C, H, and I were at Changi airport yesterday seeing our friend W off. There were nice people including me who came to Singapore to study together. K and J have already left us. K went to Sydney and J went back to Tianjin. Their situations were the same. Each of them went back to Tianjin first, then we were informed by them that they would leave Singapore. I felt sad of their leaving. But this time I felt sadder of W's leaving, because we watched her left, we watched her disappeared in the crowd.
It was a sad and sorrow moment. Her flight was at 10:30pm. We had coffee together and took some pictures with her, especially we took some pictures in front of the departure hall. She told us not to worry about her leaving and we can still meet in Tianjin. Certainly our emotion was not convinced by her comfort. The moment when W was walking into the departure hall, H cried. At that moment I was touched. Honestly I have never seen H crying before. I think as a woman H is more sensitive and emotional. Maybe because men usually don't cry, I didn't feel my tears crashing down from my eyes, but they crashed down into my heart.
Nothing exits forever. There are always moments of saying goodbye. All I can do is wish my friend all the best in her future journey.
I remembered an ancient Chinese poet Su Shi said：
人有悲欢离合 月有阴晴圆缺 此事古难全 但愿人长久 千里共婵娟
People have their grieves and joys, their togetherness and separation. The moon has its dark and clear times, its waxing and waning. Situations are never ideal since long ago. I only hope we may have long long lives. So that we may share the moon's beauty even though we are a thousand miles apart.
What's more interesting is this ancient poem can be sung. And a famous Hong Kong singer sang it in 1990s. I will listen to this music and wish all my friends who have left be happy everyday.
F, C, L, and I had a gathering in a small Chinese restaurant yesterday. We had some delicious YangRouChuan (the figure on the left). With no doubts, we received a lesson again.
C is going to finish his part time degree soon. And he is going to Australia for seven days as part of his degree program. We had a discussion about going abroad and gaining experience. F and C had a long chat of traveling to Australia. F went to Australia twice. His advice for C was be like a traveler.
Then we talked about our work. For me, I don't feel comfortable to tell other people my salary. I do like my friends. However, I like my privacy as well.
F said to C that he should get his degree first so that his starting pay will be around $3000. Then he can find a woman who earn about $2000. And with $5000 income per month, C and his future wife can afford housing and car.
I told F that how come he planed so well for C. His answer was I need to do further planing. After than he mentioned the same thing again that I should chase W, even she is heading to Australia. He said W is a honest woman, and if we get together we will have a stable family.
Although F has been to Australia, Turkey, and many other countries. Deep in his heart, he is still a person from Tianjin. However, I learned different culture to fulfill myself. In fact, I don't even know who I am. F is a nice guy, he is my good friend, but our value is different.
Just now I had a dinner with F in NTU and we had a discussion about career development.
I mentioned that one of our friend X went back to Tianjin. F asked me what she told me about her intension? I gave him the answer that X typed on MSN, she said "I probably won't go back to Singapore".
Like us, X came here to study in Polytechnic. Then she worked as an assistant engineer for three years so that she could clear the bond. Last December, we met on the plane back to Tianjin. To my surprise, she bought a single way ticket. Her explanation was she resigned her job in order to spend a longer holiday with her family. When she explained her reasons I could sense her little sadness and low confidence. At that moment, I knew that she was not fully happy with her stay in Singapore. I could sense that she was not certain about her future.
On the first day of this month X and I had a chat on MSN. When I asked her whether she would return, she gave me that answer"I probably won't go back to Singapore".
F share me his opinion on X: X was just pretending to return here. She left quietly, because she didn't have a plan. She thought returning to Tianjin would be a new start for her, but a person without plan is like a ultimate bridge to nowhere. It is not the case that going back to home will always be better. No matter where we live, we have to work hard. No pain, no gain.
F told me he spot the weakness of X: X left quietly without letting most people know, because she herself look down upon her. And she believe returning back to Tianjin could be a turning point.
When F was driving me back home, I still though of what he said. Changing environment without changing ourselves is not a promising solution.
Without any doubts, F is the most independent person among us. Yesterday he gave me a lesson on marriage again.
His idea on marriage is that our chances of finding someone and fall in love is at the maximum in colleague, then chances will slowly decrease to zero until we reach forty. His belief is it's better to marry someone whom we know well, because there are a lot of women who have money faces underneath social masks.
He gave me two examples. His cousin sister, who has high income and can speak fluently English, married to an average income guy whose job is missile research. Because she felt an average guy is more stable and secure. F's cousin brother who is the director of Shell in Southern West Chins region married to an average looking woman. Because he felt that an average woman is more loyal.
He still suggested me going for W, even she would leave Singapore next month. His suggestion was as same as last time that I should buy a necklace or something more expensive for her to show that I am interested in her. To me, W is a really nice girl, but we won't even see each other together after next month. I just simply don't believe anything could happened when two people can't stay in a same place. He insisted on his opinion. He said if can show her that I am interested and she accept it, she will come back to me after her two years degree in Austrilia. Then he said if I don't go for her, I may end up having match making to be the last choice. His point of view is in match making both sides see each other's social mask, and it will create problems after marrige.
His idea on his marriage is he will get married in two or three years time, then go back to our hometown, start a business there, and take care of his parents. His girlfriend is from a city not far away from Tianjin. He said when he go back, he will bring his parents-in-law to Tianjin.
I really like F's lesson. It showed me a different story from a different angle on a same topic. However, I think we two are different. He is more keen in to find one suitable woman and get married while I have never thought about this.
Later on, I had a chat with my mum. Her opinion is that a man with successful career is more attractive, and a successful man can go for women who are ten or even fifteen years old younger, so working hard on career is the most important step. Well, that's a different opinion again.
I don't know where to start in this post. Things happened recently are really interesting. They made me feel funny, weird, exciting, happy, and sad at same time. It's hard to describe it. So where should I begin with?
My dad wanted someone to deliver some bed sheets to me, because bed sheets are much cheaper in Tianjin. At that time he asked me which friend of mine were still in Tianjin. It turned out that F was in Tianjin.
F and I have known each other since secondary school when we were both at the age of thirteen. Then we went to the same senior high school as well. Later on, he chose to come to study in Singapore. Then I chose to come to Singapore one year later. Till today, we have known each other for thirteen years. He is very an independent person. Unlike other people, he chose neither studying in University or taking a job after polytechnic. He started his own business. He began with fish food business, then switched to clean water equipment. And now he is doing quite well in pipeline system business. Because he is a businessman, he gained a lot social experiences. Sometimes he like to share some with us. We all respect his opinions.
F, I and his girlfriend had a dinner last Friday. He gave me a lot of suggestions. One was about parents, the other was about marriage. Firstly, about parents. He said we should go back to Tianjin one day. Because he believed that both of our parents are not able to integrate with Singapore society; if they arrived here and stay for long term, they can't live happily without their friends like in our hometown. And they will age older which will require us to take care of them. His plan is to go back to Tianjin in two or three years time. And he is trying to shift his business back to Tianjin as well. Secondly, about marriage. He said I should find someone whom I know well, because there are too many women who is into money and wealth. There are many cases that women will seek divorce after marriage in order to divide husband's asset. From his words, I feel he is a grown-up adult who takes responsibility series. While I am still a half-grown kid who only think of myself.
We met again for dinner at Saturday night. This time, we had a longer conversation. He particular asked me about my point of view on marriage. I gave him my honest answer: "I don't know." Like what he said on Friday, he pointed out I should look for a person whom I have known for years. Then he started to list all the girls name from my batch who studied in same senior high school and came to Singapore. He thought W would be a good choice for me. Indeed, W and I have known each other for six years. And I do feel good about her. But we don't have that kind of electrify attractive chemistry. Unfortunately, I leaked a message out to F that W's birthday party was on Sunday. He gave me a plan that I should buy a necklace(around $50) for her as the birthday gift, then sent a sms "How about the gift" and examine her reply. He suggested that if her reply is like "Thank you, I really like it.", then I will stand up a chance. If her reply is "Thank you, it really trouble you and cost you to buy it", then I will have little chance. Even when I told F that W is heading to Australia this April for her degree. He said it doesn't matter, and if we can have a relationship, she can come back to me after her study, because she is a honest person. I was thrown into this dilemma, on one hand, I respect F's opinion and he is always keen in to help people, on the other hand, I feel W is a really nice female friend, but our future journey are different. I am more keen in to live to different places of the world while she prefer to go back soon or later.
Here comes the Sunday dinner. Before the dinner, I called my dad for suggestions. He said W and I are in two different path; she is going to Australia and I will stay in Singapore, thus it is unlikely to succeed. In the end, I didn't buy any beautiful necklace for her, because I still feel she is just a good friend of mine. Instead, me and my friends bought a birthday cake for her.
There were five people on the dinner, W, Y, H, Z, and I. We chatted from 5:30pm all the way to 8:00pm. Then we went to RP, sat at a quiet spot, and lighten up birthday candle for W. While we were having tasty chocolate cake, our topic switched to H and her friend P. Finally H confessed that she had half a year relationship with P. But she broke up with him, because her parents strongly disagreed. She said she is the only daughter and have to listen to parents to make them happy.
The truth is no matter how old we have grown, we still listen to parents. I don't know whether it is a advantage or disadvantage for our generation. Today, I have a dinner with F again. He said our destiny is defined after reaching four years old, if a person can be a general, he can't be a soldier; if he can be a soldier, he can never be a general. I really don't know about that. What I feel most is our generation(single child policy) is really lack of something. Something we can have if we have brothers or sisters. We can rely on parents, but there is a generation gap. I want to be fully independent but yet I still need help.
This was one of my painting during my first semester in NUS. At that period, I painted four black and white paintings. And I gave one of them to Dr Roy.
Last week, I attend a solar cell conference in NUS. The conference lasted two days. On the first day, it was a two and half hours period with presentations from each research group in NUS. On the second, it was a one and half hours presentation given by two top researchers in this field who are from India.
I am glad that I have 5 elder sisters and 1 elder brother here in Singapore. They gave me a lot of good suggestions. Two weeks ago we had a discussion about marriage.
A invited me for a party called "The Secret Garden Party" last Friday. 
Marion Jones, a former world champion track and field athlete, has won five medals in the 2000 summer Olympics in Sydney Australia. In October 2007, Jones admitted taking steroids before the Sydney 2000 Summer Olympics. All her medals and prizes dating back to September 2000 were forfeited.
Tong Wen, a former champion Judo athlete, has won three times gold medal in the world Judo Championship and one gold medal in 2008 summer Olympics in Beijing. She failed the drug test after the world Judo Championship 2009 in Holland and was banned for competition for two years. Her coach excuse is "She trained in Europe and was sick of the food so we gave her a lot of pork chops when she came home."
Performance-enhancing drugs are substances used by athletes to improve their performances in the sports. Not only these two, but also a lot of famous athletes used performance-enhancing drugs to get advantage in their games. Since there are only a few athletes who were reported using performance-enhancing drugs, most people believe that it is rare for athletes to use drugs. When I was discussing with one of my junior yesterday about Tong Wen's drug test failure, he was convinced by the news from Sina that it was because of pork chops. However, I didn't believe the story. I think she defiantly used drugs. It is because pork chop is a common dish in Holland, Germany, and Denmark and there is no drug test failure news from these countries' athletes recently. Plus she is the only one from China Judo team who failed the test, and it is not reasonable for a national team to serve food to their player separately. Although I was certain about her usage of drugs, at that point, I still didn't believe using drugs is a common act in competitive sports.
It is painful to watch a good friend leaving. Yesterday I just experienced that.
