Kids are so adorable

K: do u still remember me?

G: Yeah. Off course. Happy Chinese New Year.

K: Happy CNY to you too! :D:D

G: How have you been?

K: Very busy... Lots of homework.

G: How is Miss M?

K: She's fine, I think. She's still teaching me!

G: Please send my best wishes to her.

K: okay, aren't you in S?

G: I am always in S.

K: Then you could call her or something

G: Ok, I will call her.

K: haha everyone was talking about you and Miss M after the outing...

G: You mean after last TH? What did they say?

K: yup. They say you two very... um... 很配

G: Hahaha. We're just friends.

K: haha okay...

G: Off course, she is a very nice person.

K: yup, treat her well! :D:D

G: Sure.

K: haha

Conversation about heart

M: Looks like you've become more cautious about penning down thoughts via online media.

G: Because I met an interesting ...... as well.

M: You met interesting dots??

G: Interesting heart.

M: I thought you would say interesting mind or brain haha.

G: Heart has more warm connection than brain.

M: That is if you can touch the heart.

Being more emotinal

Emotional, what is being more emotional? I didn't feel it before. Somehow now I can feel it. So good that I am not a machine anymore. Emotion drives us everyday. It is different from purpose. Purpose is something we do it intentionally. Emotion is the opposite way. It is something we can not control.

Growing up 2

This year is amazing. I felt I grew up 3 years older in one year. And it is not because I went to tour some other places. Something just magically happened and wake me up this year. Yes, this world is truly different. It is different, because I never view it like this, I never open my eyes to see this colorful world. I was really wondering how I lived like that before. Live like a machine, think like a machine, and act like a machine. I was so cold and unfeeling to this world, to others, and even to myself. The beauty of the world is just beside myself. I did not chose to sense it. Suddenly I found I can learn so much at anytime, at everywhere. Last time, I had my goal. This time, I have my dream. I was Neo in the matrix. Now I am Neo in real world. It is so good to breathe the fresh air.

Let Me Be Myself

This Train Don't Stop There Anymore

This Train Don't Stop There Anymore lyrics:


You may not believe it
But I don't believe in miracles anymore
And when I think about it
I don't believe I ever did for sure
All the things I've said in songs
All the purple prose you bought from me
Reality's just black and white
The sentimental things I'd write
Never meant that much to me

I used to be the main express
All steam and whistles heading west
Picking up my pain from door to door
Riding on the storyline
Furnace burning overtime
But this train don't stop,
This train don't stop,
This train don't stop there anymore

You don't need to hear it
But I'm dried up and sick to death of love
If you need to know it
I never really understood that stuff
All the stars and bleeding hearts
All the tears that welled up in my eyes
Never meant a thing to me
Read 'em as they say and weep
I've never felt enough to cry

When I said that I don't care
It really means my engine's breaking down
The chisel chips my heart again
The granite cracks beneath my skin
I crumble into pieces on the ground

Change

Not only something, it is the same for everything. The non-changing nature of everything is everything is changing. My mind was split into two part. I acted like two different people. One is a soft and fragile person. The other is a proud and aggressive person. How did this begin? In the beginning I was a proud and aggressive person. After I went through some failures, I become a soft and fragile person. I remember I still can turn back. I always try to suppress my aggressive part. But somehow it turns out my approach of solving problems are still straight forward and aggressive. I thought I can go through somethings to make me rely on someone else. In the end, the part I have been always suppressing has come out. And I change a lot. I thought that door could be closed, but it is opened again in a different way. Yes, I am still proud and aggressive. Moreover, I found I had already gained another character through these years. It is persistent. Nothing can change over night. I can not change myself overnight. What I can achieve is to change myself over years, change myself through experiences, and change myself by thinking more. The goals are important. And the each steps of reaching the goals are more important. I remember Dr Pickard said "Work hard, make use of our hands and do kick ass jobs".

10年

昨天很欣慰，我发现我居然能够理解老李一些了。回想这些年，我们每次见面都只是吃吃喝喝，他已变得成熟时，我还是个小孩子，虽然我们同岁。我这几年没有真正理解过他的想法，只是因为我太专注了，从来没想到过，也从来想不到他的感受。现在突然发现我除了可以跟他吃吃喝喝，终于能有一些内心的交流了。我们认识10年了，现在我感受到了真正的不同，一种10年间未曾有过的感觉——“哥们，我能帮你分担一些了！”